Final Open Water training swim before The 2010 Great East Swim means only one thing - Trialling out a wetsuit!

Above: Something I'd never thought I'd see - me in a wetsuit, a necessity for The British Gas Great Swim Series if the water temperature is below 15 Degrees C. Hopefully it won't be! As I write it is 17.7 Degrees C in Alton Water Sports Centre, Ipswich. Looking good for no wetsuit! For a full set of rules and everything else about the event, click this link to download the '.PDF' brochure.

I had been dreading Sunday's swim for some weeks, but knew it had to come. I have never swum any significant distance in a wetsuit before, but I had to trial one before next Saturday's Great East Swim, just in case we have to wear one. If the water temperature is correct on the website @ 17.7C, we won't have to, but I had to be prepared. I put it on, and immediately felt confined, inhibited, cramped, enclosed. Call it what you like. I hated it and hadn't even got in the water yet.

As I stepped into the water with 2011 English Channel Aspirant Tracy Van Dyk, who was also wearing one in training for next weeks race, I noticed something immediately. Not only did I not feel cold, I couldn't feel anything. The suit totally kept me warm, and I didn't even feel as though I was in the water. If ever this was cheating at something, this was it! I started swimming and couldn't wait to touch the pier, get back and take this damn thing off. 3,100 Metres here I come at full speed!

The sea today was really choppy, and reminded me of my second English Channel swim. This was great practice as we were out in the elements here, out in The North Sea amid the wind and waves. Just like The English Channel. I thought about Tracy and thought what good practice this was for her, as well as for me for The Wash, if only we didn't have these damn wetsuits on!

'Little Hoffy' was with us today, along with 'Tiny Hoffy'. Little Hoffy was helping on the beach and taking photos, so thanks very much for that Baz.

At about 600 Metres towards the pier, I did what seasoned wetsuit swimmers would probably laugh at. I felt an air bubble down my neck, so stopped and pulled the wetsuit forward to let the air out. Or so I thought. What I actually did was let about 10 pints of water down the front of the suit, adding god knows how much cold water weight to my body! It felt cold and bloody awful. What an idiot! However, I carried on, touched the pier and headed back.

As I came ashore to feed and take the suit off, I asked Beccy where everyone was? "They've all got out" she said. I couldn't believe it! Must have been the wetsuits!

Fellow swimmers Chris Shutt and Philip Beer appeared, Philip to say goodbye as he had completed his training now for an event next week, and wouldn't be coming again. I got the suit off, had my feed and set off, suddenly feeling free without the water filled wetsuit on!

www.HoffyFlies.com? (Not really!!!) Great photo by Little Hoffy though!

Anyway, I set off back towards the pier for the second leg, and it started getting really rough in there. I was swimming against the tide, and it seemed to take forever to get to the pier. About half way down I saw Little Hoffy pushing Tiny Hoffy along the promenade, and it spurned me on as I tried to keep up with them. I eventually touched the pier, turned round and headed for home. For the first time this year, my shoulders were really hurting. The sea was getting rougher and rougher, and it was getting tough. But I just put one arm in front of the other, and completed the 6,200 Metre swim in 1 Hr. 58 Minutes.

Above: Back again to the beach after 3,100 Metres in a wetsuit and 3,100 Metres in just me trunks. I know which one I preferred!

Thanks to the beach crew again this week (pictured above) and good luck to everyone who is competing in next week's Great East Swim.

Footnote: I have got the sorest neck I have ever had from wearing that damn wetsuit. I have a large scab on the hairline, caused by friction between my skin and the wetsuit. I am reliably informed that I should have put Vaseline on my neck. Bit late for telling me that now!

Swim training severely hampered by a tin of dog food!

Above: The fattest finger you ever did see after severing a tendon on my right hand middle finger on Tuesday November 06, 2007.

Having returned from a swim in Dover Harbour on Saturday November 03, 2007 I was all fired up to start my swim training the following week. Normally on a Tuesday evening, I swim at Clarice House in the 20 Metre pool there. Unfortunately, this particular evening, I had to attend the Mildenhall Road Estate Community Association AGM in my role as a local councillor. Rushing home to wach a TV programme, I opened the back door to be greeted by our dog Casper who was waving his tail thinking it was food time. I grabbed a tin of "Chappy" dog food, lifted the ring pool lid, put a spoon down to the bottom of the can, and twisted the spoon sharply to access the food. Just as I did, Casper nudged the tin. The lip on the inside of tin, coupled with the turning movement of my hand, ripped through my skin right down to the bone, and blood spurted everywhere. I looked at it, feeling no pain and knew it was serious.

I shouted for my wife who came running while I held the two sides together, and she bandaged it up. I left it until the next morning where I spent about 4 hours in casualty, was lectured by a very nice surgeon about the state of the NHS in England, and was informed that I would require an operation to repair the tendon, but there were no beds and so I would need to have nil by mouth that night, then return to hospital the next day for the operation. I was seriously not happy. Not for any other reason than I was worried about my two way channel swim! All I asked was "When can I swim again?". The surgeon replied "Not for at least 4 weeks". I was distraught.

I spent all day Thursday in hospital, having had nil by mouth, not even a glass of water, since 10.30pm the night before. At 5.00pm I was operated on, and a large 1.6mm diameter steel pin inserted right down the midle of my finger to keep it straight while the tendon, which had been repaired, was allowed to heal. I was thoroughly depressed.

Above: The finger on November 13, 2007 after having the dressing removed to check the healing process.

On November 13, 2007, I attended my local doctors surgery to have the dressing changed, where the full extent of what I had done became apparent. The photos above clearly show it in all it's glory!

I have now had the steel pin removed, but the end of my finger is still very sore, swollen, and it actually looks like it has been sewed together twisted! I have no idea if it will ever be the same again, but at this moment in time, it doesn't feel like it.

Last night I got back in the water for the first time since my dip in Dover Harbour on November 03, 2007. It felt very strange, and my finger did not feel good on the final pull through when doing front crawl. I therefore spent most of the time with hand paddles on, which felt more comfortable.

Above: Meeting 2008 Belgian Channel relay aspirants Johan Rycx and Jean-Pierre at the CSA Dinner on Saturday November 03, 2007.

On December 28, 2007, I will be swimming in The North Sea in De Panne off the coast of Belgium with a 2008 Belgian Channel Relay team I met at the CSA Dinner in Dover on November 03, 2007. I am apprehensively looking forward to it, if that makes sense. It has been a very tough 6 weeks, and it will take a monumental effort to complete my two way, but I will not give up. The one thing that gives me hope is something Tim Cheeseman said to me when we were in France in October. He said "I never start swimming until January each year". The reason this gives me hope is that he did the channel, and about 3 hours back again this year attempting a two way, and I am slightly younger than him! (No offence Tim!).

Well, after that depressing story, I wish you all a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New year, and I will be back to form as soon as is humanly possible. I promise!

Virtual Channel Swim @ Culford School Sports Centre - Sunday May 27, 2007

Above: A small group of swimmers from Sudbury & District Swimming Club, West Suffolk Masters Swimming Club and Hoffy's "Virtual Channel Swim Team", assemble prior to each team swimming 1,344 lengths of Culford School's 25 Metre Pool.

As a means of raising additional funds for CLIC Sargent and St. Nicholas' Hospice, a group of swimmers assembled at Culford School the day after I completed my longest swim to date, and with shoulders still aching badly, and neck and shoulder raw from the previous day's adventures in the sea (see picture below).

Above: Shoulders and neck raw from 3.5 hours of pounding in Dover Harbour the day before the Virtual Channel Swim.

The idea was very simple. The English Channl is 21 miles across in a straight line. That equates to 1,344 lengths of a 25 Metre swimming pool. With six lanes between the three teams, we took two lanes each, and at 12.30pm we started to swim. At all times there was someone in each team swimming. We swam until we had swum 1,344 lengths per team. My team consisted of myself, Nick Amor, a solicitor at Gross & Co Solicitors, Glyn Hammond and Sean MacKenzie who swim with me in the mornings at Culford School, Mike Read who has swum the English Channel 33 times, Tom Gunning who swum the channel for 7 hours in 2006 before having to give up due to severe weather conditions, and two of Mike's friends Chris Berry and Gareth. I would like to thank you all personally for swimming. We all finished by 5pm and I think everyone enjoyed their day.

Above (left to right): Hoffy, Tom Gunning and Mike Read celebrate completing 1,344 lenths of Culford School pool.

I would like to personally thank the following people for all the effort they made to get the event up and running:-

• Karen Roberts at CLIC Sargent
• Gail Cornish at St. Nicholas' Hospice
• Barry Peters at The Bury Free Press for his help advertising the event
• Sara Gentry at West Suffolk Swimming Club for getting the West Suffolk Masters to compete and help with the Counting.
• Carl Cooper of Sudbury Swimming Club (a former channel swimmer) who brought his team across and made the day what it was.
• Gudrun Collins of GeeCol Wellness Studio for massaging all the aching limbs between swims.
• Mark Grubb of Med and Mind for providing the Electro-Magnetic Treatment between swims
• Chris Licence at Culford School Sports Centre for giving us the pool free of charge to help us raise money for the charities.

There are two more clubs, Mildenhall and Stowmarket who are doing the swim in their own pools in June. Good luck to you all, and once I have an update with all the funds raised, I will post it here with all the photos.

Thank you eveyone for supporting this event, including my wife Beccy and my son Sebastian, who constantly give up their weekends to help me achieve my dream of swimming the English Channel.

Hoffy.

Web: www.HoffysChannelSwim.org.uk
E-mail: paul@hoffyschannelswim.org.uk

A Bollocking from The General and a nasty rash...

Above: Getting out of the harbour after our 1.5 hour swim at 11 Degrees Centigrade was a cold experience.

Getting up for our 10.00am swim on Sunday May 13, 2007 was an entirely different experience than the previous day. It was dull, cold and raining. However, the sea was remarkably calm. It just goes to show what a difference a day makes to the weather in the Channel.

Today we were going to do a 1.5 hour swim at water temperature 11 Degrees Centigrade. Now this is important to note. When I swim, I like to swim for 45 minutes before my first feed, then feed every 30 minutes. I use Maxim energy drink, which is what is recommended for channel swimmers. My swim was quite uneventful and I swum around the harbour for 45 minutes before swimming towards the shore, treading water and shouting to my wife (who was sitting in the car out of the rain, doing her nails) for my drink. "I haven't got a drink" shouts Barry, who watches and helps from the beach with the General. "Not you. I'm talking to my wife" I shout back. Beccy, get's out of the car, puts on her mac, put's the umbrealla up, rumages around in the back of the car, then gently strolls down the beach while I tread water freezing my n#%s off and eventually arrives, careful that the umbrella is secure so she doesn't get her hair wet. She throws it in to me, I drink it, throw the empty container back then continue for a further 3/4 hour.

When I got back after 1.5 hours I was cold. I got out, walked up to The General to give her my number and I was greeted by "Hoffy! What the hell do you think you are doing stopping for a drink? You don't need a drink after only 45 minutes. Consider yourself bollocked. The first one of the season!". I walked off stunned, but just very slightly chuffed. I had heard about Freda's famous bollockings, and I was the recipient of the first one of the 2007 season! What an honour!

Getting out and changing uder a little shelter close to the beach, to get out of the rain, was a very cold experience, and for the first time since my hypothermia experience in Felixstowe, I felt cold. The picture above shows this quite clearly I think.

Above: Swimming for 1.5 Hours in Dover Harbour without shaving for 24 hours, leaves a nasty graze on my right shoulder.

When we arrived back home to Bury, my shoulder felt quite sore. I took off my shirt and to my surprise I found quite a nasty rash on my right shoulder. It was funny, in the channel swimmers forum the previous week, someone had e-mailed in to ask whether people shaved or not before swimming. Someone e-mailed back and said it can leave a rash if you don't. I personally had never experienced a rash until now. By the following Friday, it was still very sore and had a crusty scab on top. I can assure you, I will not be swimming without shaving again!

Hoffy.

Web: www.hoffyschannelswim.org.uk
E-mail: paul@HoffysChannelSwim.org.uk